Friday, 27 July 2012

Three Things

Source

A quiet storm comes without warning
Laughing one minute and then 
a jab in the ribs
Pain or gain
Each with its strain

A day passes much without warning
While it ticks away, what's done is done
What's left is either not of gain
or causes too much pain
until there's nothing left

because the time has come
to end three things
Done
Undone
pain-loss-gain

©Adura Ojo 2012

So...Join us at Romantic Friday Writers, people! Read more entries in this week's challenge, below.

40 comments :

  1. Hi Adura. I like the 'suddeness' of this. How things change. 'Laughing one minute...then a jab in the ribs'. I love the ending - pain-loss-gain.Three things. Smart girl as always.

    Denise

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    1. Thanks, lovely lady! That's how life feels sometimes. One minute up, down the next - but we owe it to ourselves to keep it moving , to stay on course even when it's tough. It's always a delight to read your comments, Denise. Hope you're having a fab weekend.

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  2. This is somewhere every intelligently written

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    1. Thanks, Rahul. Much appreciated.

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  3. i loved it Adura,its gathering everything in a simple deep way,thanks for such share

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    1. I do try to keep it simple but deep. I'm glad it comes across that way, Radwa. Thanks:)

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  4. Oh this is great and I love the last three lines, they sum it all up beautifully in a wistfully wry way.

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    1. That's probably the bit of brit in me, Madeleine. Can't live on this isles without some wry rubbing off, lol.

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    1. Oooh, Francine - 'Glad you think so:)

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  6. A lot of emotion packed into a few words, great writing.

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    1. Thank you, Sally. Sometimes wish I could write longer poems. But I'll probably forget what I want to write somewhere in the middle. So I cut to the chase and keep it short, lol.

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  7. My dear friend,
    Your style of writing impacted the point here. I sense wisdom and felt emotions. Good job my dear.

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    1. It's always nice to hear from you, my friend. Hope you're having a great weekend.

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  8. Indeed some things change unexpectedly. Things are going fine, and then out of nowhere something changes. Hard, very hard. Your poem conveys that.

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    1. True, Mary. It is hard. I had some shocking news this weekend about someone that I really admire - It made me sad and also think about traumatic events in the past that one was not prepared for.

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    2. Oh I'm sorry to hear about the shocking news Adura. I just came back for another read.

      BTW it's great to have you back and to go round and read your supportive comments on all the entries. You're a much appreciated member of our group! Thank you.

      Denise

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    3. Thanks, Denise. 'Settling back into reality now, I think. Sort of the end of reality check week, lol.

      It's an honour to be a member of RFW, Denise. I appreciate the hard work you've put into leading and sustaining our group. You and Donna are doing a great job!

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  9. What's done is done ~ Nice share ~ And yes, I deliberately hid my voice and show it in the last line ~

    Great to see you Adura ~

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    1. Great to see you too, Grace. 'Interesting...that I picked up on your voice:)

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  10. ouch...this def feels like something that came out of nowhere and not in a good way...health issues is the first thing that came to mind...

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    1. Funny you should mention that, Brian:)

      Lots of stuff was on my mind when I wrote this....including traumatic events and how that can really throw people off balance. But I was also thinking about the human experience... Then I got some news the day after I wrote the poem that someone I admire and respect highly had developed some serious health issues in the past year and now has a disability. It threw me off balance - really sad.

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  11. Enjoyed the read... thank you for sharing

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    1. Thanks for reading, Aidz. Was at yours but found it difficult to leave a comment. Is it possible to add blogger to the comment box options?

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  12. The tone of this is so clear. I love the way it builds up, and comes to resolution in the final stanza. Well done!

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    1. Thanks, Sherry. I do owe you an email. I'll be on to it, I promise:)

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  13. Pain, loss, gain. Pain is a risk we all must take if we are ever to find love, isn't it.
    Very nice read, thank you.

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    1. I guess so, Daydreamertoo. Not just in love but many other things in life too. That's what I meant about the entirety of the human experience - which was pretty much what was on my mind while writing.

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  14. sometimes it hits just like this..and i like your way to deal with it

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    1. Yes Claudia, all of life is like that really - at some point or the other and most especially at the end. All done and undone.

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  15. Very insightful!

    lazioman.blogspot.com

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    1. Thanks, Toye. Welcome to my blog.

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  16. Pithy poem Adura!

    Thanks for your comment on my post. I have written a long explanation about the relationship between Jenny and the photographer, Tom Norton in the comment box after my post. Jenny and Tom are not lovers. She did not run away with him. She accepted a writing assignment and he is her photographer.
    I am toying with the idea of writing more about their working relationship in an expanded version of my story.
    Read more on my post. I will continue this story for the next two challenges and warp it up with 'Romantic Picnic' unless the next challenge after that offers a theme that is workable for my story.

    Happy Summer!
    Best wishes,
    Anna
    Three things I could have done better

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    1. I am enjoying your series, Anna. Thanks for clearing that little thing up. It is an interesting story. I like the way you introduce original elements into it each week like the newspaper interview last week, and this week, a diary entry. Yes, I've already had a sneak peek and I'll be back to comment:)

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