Wednesday, 18 April 2018

WEP: Scented




Sun sitting on her forehead
dinner on the table
clock ticking 
got dressed in full moon
she remembered 
clock ticking
waiting for him

sun bouncing on her thigh 
scented bee in ear
finger tapping
she packed a bag 
he came 
she left
dinner was over

© Jo-ke Ojo
April 2018

WEP prompt: Road Less Traveled.
Read other works here

26 comments :

  1. I like the rhythm of this piece and how it moved through the journey of the character and her choice.

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  2. I like this poem, especially the ending. "...he came, she left, dinner was over." He probably deserved it, the cad. I'm always cheering when a woman takes her life in her own hands. Great poem.

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    1. She does seem to know when to say goodbye. Thanks, Olga.

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  3. Echoing Olga. Hooray for women in charge of their own destiny.

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    1. I'm sure there are a few of us out there who wish our 'timing' was as good as hers.

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  4. A concise tale about a women choosing her own destiny.

    from:christopherscottauthor.wordpress.com

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  5. She decided she had waited long enough.:)

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    1. Everyone is time conscious, these days. She is one of them.

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  6. Strike three he’s out yet!
    Was any pitch ever thrown?
    I know she made that chose
    But it was her chose alone.

    I’m thinking that was a Road she ran down.

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    1. Ha ha ha, anything is possible, Desk49.

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  7. More power to her! He was probably not worth waiting for in the first place. Loved the line - scented bee in ear..

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    1. From one poet to another, I like it too, Nila.

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  8. Perfect, a person can only wait for so long. It was time to jump, this time into what she really wanted/needed. Great piece!

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    1. Thanks, Yolanda. I'm guessing it takes time to get to the jump and then the burden is gone.

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  9. Love the flow of this poem. I can sense the growing frustration of this woman, and like her, would have left in the same manner.

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    1. Thanks, Carrie. Lets hope she left in good time.

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  10. Hi Jo-ke Ojo! So much is so few words. I love the way you've used the sun to show the passing of time while she waits...Sun's on her forehead, then her thigh. But for all the nature descriptions, I like best...'he came/she left'
    We feel this is a strong woman who gave a man a chance, maybe many in the past, and now she's had enough.

    A powerful poem of someone about to go down a new road.

    Denise x

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    1. And you say poetry is not your forte, Denise? You do well, I say. Thank you.

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  11. haha showed him. Had enough of his crap. Nicely done indeed.

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  12. A moment comes and goes, although that moment, when we decide to change our direction, can seem like eternity. Well done! He missed the moment, and now he will see the consequences.

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